Thursday, May 18, 2017

Insecure and Introverted

My Domme I've been talking to via Kik broke up with me. I can't say I'm surprised given our interpersonal distance but it hurts a lot because of how difficult it is for me to connect, deeply, with people out in the community at large. I've made a few acquaintances but no one I feel like I could share these insecurities with.

It's hard having an unknown and misunderstood fetish in a community of people who, generally, enjoy impact and other more pain inducing types of play. There's no group or clique for fart fetishists or even people who like facesitting out here in the community. I'm starting a munch for our kind but I don't hold any misconceptions that it'll be well attended.

Fart fetishists are in the shadows, paying ProDommes for sessions and then talked about in classes, like in a humiliation class I just attended. We're not out and proud, in fact, the community seems to prefer us hidden and out of sight; none have expressed any sort of intellectual curiosity towards the fetish.

I don't know how this gets better. Outside help I suppose, people who know people on a more intimate level saying, "hey, I know this guy into that"...but maybe they aren't. Maybe there's none who do it for enjoyment, maybe it's all a money making operation because our kind is willing to pay for the privilege. 

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